Marriage is a big part of one’s life and identity. To make a decision to spend your life with one person, invest emotionally, financially and physically in a relationship, and then see it break down before your eyes can be scary, traumatic, heartbreaking and completely shattering for any individual. Yet life dictates that one has to move on, look beyond the pain and blame, and create happiness, hope and health once again.
One of the most tragic consequences of a broken marriage is often a suffering, physically weak individual. The stress that comes with a broken marriage is immense. This stress reduces immunity, affects our hormones, increases weight and blood pressure.
Heart attack, anxiety pangs, mental breakdown and depression are common after a broken marriage too. Many studies and surveys have already told us that your health is maintained and enhanced when you have a positive, interactive relationship. The opposite occurs when you have constant rows with your partner. People have suffered from heart attacks and died prematurely, due to the excessive stress, bickering and trauma in a bad relationship.
The symptoms and experiences only exaggerate when a relationship is completely breaking down. Prevent this from happening to you. We understand the pain and conflict, but don’t let it ruin your life. Relationships are important and integral, but the gift of life is supreme.
In this post, we talk about ways to preserve sanity, hope, positivity, and good health, after a broken marriage, and how to persevere during these tough times.
Take Care of Your Heart
This is something you will need to do literally and metaphorically. There is increased pressure on the heart, and consequently greater risk of heart attacks, when your personal relationships are turbulent. Divorce and the ending part of a marriage is usually the most stressful time for a couple.
Add to that so-called stress relievers like cigarettes, fatty foods and your heart is on a downhill swing. Stress, unhealthy lifestyle and conflicted relationships are all primary causes of heart attacks and heart damage. All of these thicken your blood and clog your arteries.
Don’t be careless about your health. Don’t put yourself in danger. Eating healthy is of utmost importance during these times. Do not resort to excessive drinking. Keep a tab on your body. Get full body check-ups periodically.
Do any form of exercise- running, cycling, jogging, swimming, dancing, yoga, whatever suits you the best. Do not become lethargic and ignore your body. It’s very important you don’t let your cholesterol and blood pressure levels zoom up. Don’t let your heart break into pieces in any way.
Reiki, meditation are other ways to relieve your pain. Take up a few classes. Make a conscious effort to eat healthy, exercise, smile, read and watch positive things.
Tackle Depression Smartly
Depression develops as the marriage starts falling apart, arguments, and fights increase, and distance seeps in between the couple. It almost reaches the peak when the final separation is happening. Nobody wants to know or believe that your marriage has failed. It only makes it worst, when you see in love couples walking around hand-in-hand, and everywhere on billboards and buses. You feel like a failure yourself.
But think about it this way. You had that once. It was a part of your life, it gave you happiness, and confidence, and everything else. But the relationship also caused you immense pain, self-doubt, humiliation and extreme forms of faithlessness and negativity.
Shouldn’t you be happy then, that all that is finally getting over, that you have a chance to start afresh and draw the map of your life devoid of pain and conflict? Don’t think of how lonely you will be, but how independent you will be. Don’t look at your old photographs with your spouse, but invest in your body, your health. Hit the gym, look great, and click some amazing photographs of yourself in places and areas you have never been to before.
Don’t at any cost let depression sink in. Instead, make this the time to come out of depression. Don’t isolate yourself from the world. Meet new people. Learn an instrument, watch a musical, immerse yourself in work, take up a new hobby, go for a run, get a pet, bake, read, spend quality time with your kids, meditate. Don’t become passive. Keep yourself occupied, alive and make a bucket list of everything you want and plan to do. Best way to avoid depression- start doing things on that list.
Hire an Expert and Empathetic Attorney
When you know it has to end, don’t stretch your marriage and only prolong your suffering. Give your marriage several chances, but know that if several didn’t work, one more won’t. Have the courage to end it gracefully.
We understand that this is not going to be an easy feat. Make it a little easier for yourself by hiring an expert and empathetic divorce lawyer. A veteran Indianapolis divorce lawyer says, “Divorce is a very trying time emotionally, but it also comes with a gamut of legal implications. At this time, it’s important to hire an attorney for yourself who is clear-headed, and objective. The legal professional involved should be sensitive, and supportive, and able to keep his client positive and active. At the same time, this individual should be sharp, clear-headed and objective to maintain professionalism within the interaction while fighting aggressively for rights of his client.”
Get Rid of Hostility and Anger
Finally, and most importantly give positivity and good health a green signal even when your marriage is crumbling. This may seem impossible, but it is very feasible. Just one simple trick is what you need. Get rid of hostility and anger. You can’t imagine the wonders it will do to your mind and body. Be forgiving, even better forget things. Holding on to bitter memories can never give you peace or happiness.
The world is not a bad place. Don’t be hostile towards it. Don’t view everyone with a lens of suspicion. Learn to trust again. Keep the settlement with your spouse as amicable as you can. And if that’s not happening, don’t bring back the bitterness home. Learn to laugh more at yourself. Lighten up. Make the effort.
If you have kids, be grateful, don’t repent for them. Spend time with them, but don’t them as an instrument to hurt your spouse. Don’t resent your struggles, but cherish them. Know that they have only made you stronger.
Smile, meet friends, have stimulating conversations. And to do that read, watch, hear. Keep your heart, ears and eyes open for happiness and positivity. Stop believing happiness is elusive. Throw off the garb of pessimism and cynicism, and express your opinions fearlessly. You will be a happier, more confident, and healthier individual. Don’t let your failed marriage wreck your mental and physical well-being.